Escape and Evasion

Now, due to my unnamed friend's allegiance with the dark side, a chance encounter with this person is not favorable.  How long will I be in "Michael Weston (Burn Notice)" mode here?  

Lost to the Dark Side

I ask myself, WWYD (what would Yoda do)?  I have lost a friend to the dark side and believe that the best thing for this particular soul is to fall completely.  I have made failed attempts to normalize this person on many occasions.  I am tired, and he is resilient and has alienated many people.  Maybe this long fall will reveal who his real friends were/are.  Good luck on your journey, I think you need it.  Oh and, send a shout out to the Prince of Darkness for me.

Load up B4 running w/Shanna

Had a great run yesterday with my friend Shanna.  She is an actual athlete where I just dabble.  I was actually planning on running long (10 miles), but she talked me into 14+ish yesterday.  I was a bit off schedule and totally forgot to eat lunch and had a pretty small breakfast; smaller that I would have had if I were going to run more than 10 miles.  Anyway, we started at around 1215pm and by the time we got to 12 miles, I was about to eat my wrists.  I burn more calories with her because we talk non-stop, and usually run faster than I would by myself.  We stopped at her van, which looks like the kind of van you would warn your daughters about, to get some calories.  Shanna has a bunch of sponsors, so it is like going to a tiny race expo in there.  I got some little race jelly beans and off we went.  We finished and weren't able to stay and chat about the run due to the crazy fat guy there that was talking to himself about doughnuts and wizardry.  

Medical Humor

I was listening to Scott Hamilton talk on the Today show about how he tries to find humor in everything.  Scott uses this technique/way of viewing the world to cope with the many hurdles in his own personal life (ie. prostate and brain cancer).  I tend to take life too serious and have been trying to apply this technique.  I figured that if it works for super serious shit like cancer, it would have to work for me.  It actually works when you remember to use it.  My problem with this is that by the time I try to find humor in a situation, I am already so pissed off that it would take Richard Prior, Jim Cary, and Dave Chappell on crack to make me see humor in it.  I just don't know if I can integrate a humor chip into my, very full, mother board at this juncture.  I am afraid that if I did, I would be laughing out loud at things and people, like those guys on the subway in New York. 

NEWS BREAK: {holy shit, the chick in the booth next to me, at Day Break, just blew out the biggest fart and pretended that it never happened.  Now that is some funny shit.}  

Anyway, I digress.  Maybe that is the trick.  I just need to go full f'n bozo and start laughing at all this b.s. OUT LOUD!

Juice/Fruit Fast

I recently tried (emphasis on tried) doing a three day fruit juice fast.  This was not a new years resolution nor would I suggest it be.  The first day you feel nice and clean; almost righteous over all those carnivores you can snub your nose at.  Day two quickly begins to get old toward lunch.  By dinner it is an experiment rather than a cleansing ritual.  I came home from work late on day two and tried to go to sleep.  No sugar plum dreams; more like chasing down a wild boar naked with a knife in my mouth.  I woke from my dream and went straight to the refrigerator and slammed down a protein drink followed by a giant ham sandwich.  One day yes, 2-3 days and say hello to Mr. Poopie pants.  Not to mention the wonderful array of smells my body emitted.  Oh, did I mention that if you are a long distance runner you can forget it, because your body goes into defcon 3 if you try to run more than about 20 minutes?  On a brighter note, it did teach me the importance of a well balanced diet especially for athletic types with vivid imaginations.

Rock on.

"Step Brothers" Movie Review

Hi all,

Who loves time off from the everyday grind?  (rhetorical question, or you can talk to yourself)  I do.  I love to have time to run trails, swim, walk my dogs hang out in the coffee shop and just be.  I do, however tend to go "high and right" or "high order" (military/operator slang term for a little pissed off) when that precious free time is fettered away.  I was recently misled by some colleagues on a not so intellectual movie choice.  Now, don't get me wrong, I do enjoy some good old fashion pedestrian humor, but the movie "Step Brothers" is possibly the worst fucking waste of time, piece of shit movie I have ever seen in my life.  I am actually going to have a hard time associating with my friends and coworkers after being directed toward this silver screen fucking joke of a flic.  I mean, if the writers/directors aim was to create a movie that would alienate people from each other's ridiculous movie choice, kudos.

Hope you enjoyed my review of the worst film of all time.

Merry Jewmas

Hi all,

Just thought I would send a shout out to all you mofos that read my blog (all four of you).  Have a great holiday and watch your ass.  There are a lot of freaks out there.

Love,

djp

Funny Little Boy

Funny story.  This 4 yo boy's mother told me the funniest story the other night at a dinner party. They (boy and fam) just moved from a larger city to Lubbock where they had had him (little boy) in a Jewish pre-school, even though they were not Jewish.  Anyway they moved to Lubbock for jobs at TTU this summer and put him in an Episcopal school.  The little boy was told the news that he was to be going to an Episcopal school and his response was just so perfect.  The boy asked his mother and father, "How am I going to be Jewish?"  

I just had to tell this story, because I have been asking myself that question for a long time now.  

"KTXT Asassinated by Domestic Terrorist Group"

When I heard the news yesterday, my response was similar to that of being attacked by terrorists.  "KTXT goes off the air" says the Daily Toreador.  More like, KTXT blown to bits by I.E.D. today.  Who in the hell are these people.  That station has been a cornerstone, for me at least, since the early 80's.  It just seemed short sighted.  I would imagine that a fund raiser would have pulled them through if the listeners and the staff for that matter would have had more that half a days notice.  But ya know, it really fits in this disposable cut throat world we live in.  Kudos to you fuckers for yanking yet another piece of nostalgia from Tech.  Maybe you can buy a new f'n goal post or box seat with the extra cash.

The joking racist

Ok, pet peeve time.  My favorite kinds of racists are the joking ones.  The ones that try to cover it by trying to show you how they can be comfortable joking about your race/religion right at you.  You know these funny people, they are freaking everywhere.  It's funny the first time, but holy shit man, give it a rest.  I hate whitie.